You’re coming to London! EXCELLENT choice; it’s the best city in the world. In summer, anyway.

My #1 tip for visiting is that, unfortunately, London is generally not a city that rewards spontaneity. Shows, restaurants, and friends’ calendars book up weeks in advance, so it’s worth doing (some) planning ahead.

This is an opinionated guide based very much on my own tastes and preferences. Your mileage may vary!

Pre-book some fun events ahead of time

Begin your planning by booking a couple of big events/nights out you’re excited about, and plan the rest of your schedule from there.

• Watch one of the cheesy big West End shows. Really! Here’s an up-to-date list of what’s on. Try LoveTheatre or TodayTix for discounted tickets, or check out this guide if you're really on a budget. Most of the theatres are around Soho, so plan Adventure 2 for that day. My personal favourite shows are:
  • Book of Mormon (if you generally don’t like musicals, and have an irreverent sense of humour, this is the one to see).
  • Operation Mincemeat (the hot new show - smaller and less “spectacular” than the others but brilliant)
  • Hamilton
  • Hadestown
  • Wicked (for the classic Big Musical experience)
  • Lion King, Les Mis, Cabaret and Matilda are also great. 
• If you’re after “high culture”, see what’s on at these venues:
  • Punchdrunk (these immersive shows are unmissable, but you may have to sell your right toe for tickets)
  • Southbank Centre
  • Barbican
  • National Theatre
  • Royal Albert Hall
  • Sadler’s Wells (contemporary dance)
  • Royal Ballet & Opera House
  • Shakespeare’s Globe
  • Also check what theatre shows are currently running.
• Check TimeOut, CondeNast and Londonist for festivals and major events.
• Check whether there are any big music gigs you’re into, or hook up Songkick to your Spotify for recommendations based on your tastes.
• For interesting/weird/edgy music and theatre, see what’s happening around Dalston: EartH, Dalston Jazz Bar, the Arcola Theatre, Cafe OTO, The Jago, Ridley Road Market Bar, The Shacklewell Arms, Dalston Curve and Rio Cinema. If nothing in Dalston catches your fancy, try Hackney Central (MOTH, Paper Dress, Hackney Empire, Two Palms, Oslo).
• For properly cool London you’ve got to hit up Brixton or Peckham in South London. My #1 favourite music thing is the weekly Jazz/Afrobeats night Steam Down’s #SDWeekly (every Wednesday in Pekham). Electric Brixton or Phonox are big clubs, POP Brixton and Effra Social have eclectic music/pub lineups. Have dinner beforehand in Brixton Village if you can - it’s where you’ll find the best Caribbean food in the city.
• If you're after LGBTQ+ fun, try The Divine, Bethnal Green Working Men’s Club, Dalston Superstore (in Hackney) or Heaven (in Charing Cross). There’s also a scene in Soho, but it’s a bit more commercial. Lesbian bars include She (Soho) and La Camionera (Hackney).
• For mega club vibes, I’d see what’s on at Fabric, Ministry of Sound, Colour Factory, Drumsheds, Koko, Electroworx, Village Underground, XOYO and Queen of Hoxton.

Spend some time researching your unique interests. You can find anything in London. You could spend your whole trip visiting bookshops, or trawling the city's niche museums, or attending obscure science and history lectures.

Orienting yourself

London is not a city; it’s a collection of villages (boroughs), each with its own distinct vibe. It’s a huge sprawl and getting around is exhausting, so choose one or two areas to explore each day if you can. 

London is divided into concentric circles, with Zone 1 at the centre. 

• Zone 1: the tourist centre, where you’ll find stuff like Big Ben and Buckingham Palace (and lots of bankers). Fun fact: there’s a special part of Zone 1 called “The City of London” / “The City” which is technically an entirely different city.
• Zone 2: the buzzy parts of London, where all the trendy stuff is. Do make time to explore some bits of Zone 2 - you’ll get a much better sense of “real” London.
• Zone 3+: the suburban parts of London, where people actually live, but there’s not as much fun stuff to see.

The closer to the centre you can afford to stay, the easier it will be for you to get around. If you can, try to stay in Zone 1 (anywhere), Hackney, Hampstead, Camden or Clapham. Definitely try not to stay anywhere further out than Zone 3, or you'll spend half your visit just commuting.

Speaking in very broad stereotypes: North-West London is boujie & beautiful (Demure), North-East London is grimy & cool (Brat), central London is tourists & office workers, south of the Thames is too far for me and I have no idea what it’s like because I almost never go there (except to Brixton and Peckham, see above).

One of the first things I suggest you do in London is a walking tour - this is the best way to get to know the city. London Walks is well-reviewed and runs tours every day, covering specific themes, or this list looks pretty solid. Do a walking tour rather than the hop-on-hop-off buses, unless walking's tricky for you. London's built for ambling.

Three quick notes on getting around:

• If you’re spending a foreign currency, it is worth getting an Oyster card (you’ll get a better exchange rate than if you tap your foreign bank card every time).
• Install CityMapper. It offers much better public transport route suggestions than Google Maps. 
• Do use the Lime bikes, but for goodness' sake buy a helmet. If you’re not a confident cyclist, it’s worth shelling out for the BikeMap app so you can choose entirely car-free routes.

Suggested itineraries

Adventure 1: City of London and Southwark (Zone 1)

A good prelude to an evening at Southbank Centre, the Barbican or the National Theatre. 

• Hit the Tower of London as soon as it opens - it's super cool and worth going inside, and it's pretty empty if you go early.
• From there, walk up to London Bridge and cross the river to the south bank (enjoy the view of Tower Bridge). 
• Grab a snack at Borough Market.
• Walk up the south bank of the Thames to Shakespeare's Globe (it's fun, go inside) then the Tate Modern. Definitely spend a few hours in the Tate Mod. Most of it's free, but there are special exhibitions you have to buy tickets for.
• If you're still feeling full of energy at that point, continue to Southbank Centre where you’ll get a great view of Westminster and Big Ben from across the river.
• Head to your evening activity!

Optional stops you might want to add on: 

• St Dunstan’s in the East is a really lovely tiny ruin.
• Guildhall’s Art Gallery, where you can see the remains of an old Roman amphitheatre
• Horizon 22 for an amazing view of the city. It's free, unlike the Shard. SkyGarden is another free option, but you have to pre-book a ticket.
• St Paul's Cathedral (it's cool, but skip it if you've seen other European cathedrals - they're all the same).
• The Old Operating Theatre near Borough Market is morbid and fascinating if you’re interested in surgical history.
• The Museum of London is a brilliant introduction to the city and its history.

Adventure 2: Soho and Chinatown (Zone 1)

The classic prelude to a theatre or West End evening.

• Depending on your interests and energy levels, begin the day at Carnaby Street (high-end shopping), the National Portrait Gallery (classical art - smaller but more interesting than the adjacent National Gallery), or the British Museum (where you can see all the excellent things the English stole from other countries). 
• Mid-afternoon, head to Soho and explore the shops. It’s most vibey around Greek Street and Dean Street. Try to find the seven noses. Stop for a drink and some peoplewatching at any of the excellent pubs and bars. If you're feeling adventurous, there are plentiful hidden speakeasies in Soho, and half the fun is finding them. The Vault is hidden behind a bookcase, The Blind Pig is above a restaurant ... explore, ask around, or resort to Google. 
• When it's approaching dinner time, walk down to Chinatown. Leave yourself some time to wander around and browse the shops, where you'll find everything from K-beauty goops to waving lucky-cat sculptures. If you like rare antiquarian tomes try Any Amount of Books and Cecil Court, and if you like tiny bricks try the LEGO store. Find somewhere for dinner: the food in Chinatown is generally excellent, but my faves are Plum Valley and Speedboat Bar (both have good vegan options).
• Watch your show!
• For a post-show drink, head to Waxy's Little Sister to try the fancy drinks elevator, or go back to Soho.

If you've got extra time/energy, it can be fun to add some of these Holborn stops at the start of your day: 

• Hunterian Museum for more gory-but-fascinating surgical history and specimens in jars.
• Novelty Automation for hilarious and bizarre hand-made arcade games. I cannot overstate how charming this place is.
• Sir John Soane's Museum for classical sculptures and historical oddities.
• London Transportation Museum, which small children absolutely adore.

If you’re a massive nerd like me, take a look at my geek-specific recommendations along this route.

Adventure 3: South Ken to Westminster (Zone 1)

A good prelude to an evening at the Royal Albert Hall or a boat ride out to Kew.

If you want to do the iconic London tourist things, luckily they’re all in a fairly compact area. It would be a doable bolt-on to Adventure 1 or Adventure 4.

• Start your day with one (or more) of the major museums in South Kensington - they're wonderful and they're mostly free.
  • If you're interested in design, go to the V&A.
  • For contemporary art, go to the Serpentine.
  • With kids, the science museum and national history museums are great fun. 
• Either head up to Hyde Park and walk East (for pretty park vibes) or wander through the lush streets of Chelsea and Belgravia until you end up at Buckingham Palace (try time it to catch the changing of the guards). I mean, you have to.
• Go to Westminster and look at Westminster Cathedral, Big Ben and Downing Street, if they’re of interest. And The Churchill War Rooms are quite cool.

If you’re done by early afternoon, what’s pretty fun is to take the ferry from Westminster to Kew Gardens and spend the rest of the day there (check you’ve left yourself enough time - the ferry takes about 90 minutes to get to Kew, and you'll want to spend at least an hour there before it closes). 

Alternatively, the most absurdly boujie part of London is just to the north of Westminster in St James, around Fortnum & Mason, which is a classic place to have a wildly overpriced afternoon tea. Poke around this area and you may uncover private palaces, a recreation of Sherlock Holmes living room, and secret member’s clubs you won't be allowed into.

Adventure 4: Hampstead Heath and Camden (Zone 2)

In warm weather, the most dreamy way to fill a London day is by going for a swim in one of the Hampstead Heath ponds. In peak summer you have to book, so see what time slot you can get and plan from there. The Ladies Pond is literal paradise on earth (trans women and enbys are welcome); the Men’s Pond is a famous cruising spot, and there’s a family-friendly Mixed Pond if you’ve got a mixed-gender group. From Hampstead, it's a quick hop over to the traditional home of punks and goths, Camden.

(Note: I find Camden overwhelming and far too crowded on the weekends, so try to do this adventure on a weekday if you can.)

If your swimming time-slot means you’re starting in Hampstead Heath, this can be a good prelude to a night out in Dalston, Islington or Camden.

• Start with brunch around adorable Hampstead. If you’re not very hungry, a quick coffee and pastry around Hampstead Heath overground station might be simpler.
• Go to the ponds and enjoy your swim.
• Swing past Parliament Hill for a great view of the city.
• Head to Camden Market (bus, Lime or overground) and explore. Don’t miss Cyberdog for dressing like you're from the future. 
• When you’re hungry again, avoid the food at Camden Market itself, rather walk just 2 minutes to the far less busy Hawley Wharf Market.

When you are fully outpeopled, you can either call it a day, head to your evening adventure, visit the British Library, or wander down the canal to Regent's Park, where you can sometimes spot the monkeys in the London Zoo.

If your swimming time-slot means you’re ending in Hampstead Heath, start off in Camden Market (2-3 hours before), pick up some takeaways that you won’t mind eating cold, head to the Heath, enjoy your swim, and end the day with a picnic on Parliament Hill.

An optional sidequest for this adventure is Highgate Cemetary, one of the loveliest old graveyards in the city, where Karl Marx and Douglas Adams are buried.

Adventure 5: Hackney!

Saving the best for last. This is my London, and the borough I love the most. Try to do this adventure on a weekend, if you can. I've got two variations depending on where you want to end up.

If you're a fellow nerd, I've got some suggested dorkier Hackney itineraries here.

Day trips

If you'd like to see more of England than London, my top suggestions are:

1. Windsor Castle & Oxford. Windsor Castle is by far the coolest old castle thing I've seen in the UK, and while you're out there you might as well go the extra hour (by train) to see Oxford.
2. Cambridge & Ely. Cambridge is a very compact, old, beautiful university town, and nearby Ely is the best tiny village in England (everyone there is obsessed with eels).
3. Bath is juuuust doable as a daytrip, but it's worth staying overnight if you can. Go to Bath if you love Jane Austen and want Bridgerton vibes.
4. Brighton is a supremely cute hipster seaside town.
5. St Albans is just an hour away if you want the quintessential tiny English village experience.

Personally, I don't think Stonehenge is worth the faff; sorry druids.

Avoid!

In my opinion, these London experiences are overrated and not worth the price or effort:

• Madam Tussauds (unless you have kids)
• The London Dungeon (unless you have morbid kids)
• The London Eye
• The utterly pointless cable car near Greenwich
• Oxford Street (unless there's a very specific shop you need to find, which you cannot find elsewhere in the city - but honestly this whole area is a nightmare throng of tourists).
• Piccadilly Circus
• Harrods
• Abbey Road (literally just a zebra crossing)
• The Prime Meridian at the Royal Observatory in Greenwich (instead of paying for a ticket and standing in an interminable queue, just go north of the Royal Observatory, where you can stand on the silly line for free)